“Keep the Government out of My Vagina” Says Right Wing Group

Below is the newest ad encouraging American youth to “opt out” of Obamacare, courtesy of OptOut.org. It depicts an unnerving caricature of “Uncle Sam” forcing a pelvic exam on a young woman as a consequence of the Affordable Care Act. There’s also one for men, the thesis being “keep the government out of your butt,” so… score one for gender equality?

The message of reproductive privacy from the government is more than a little ironic, considering that the GOP itself pushed a restrictive pro-life bill through the Texas legislature this summer and proposed a 20-week abortion ban in Albuquerque.

I, too, am all for keeping the government out of my vagina, which is why I oppose unnecessary transvaginal ultrasounds and laws that limit women’s access to birth control. This is simple stuff.

But no, according to OptOut.org, which is funded by the notorious Koch brothers (who have also backed pro-life campaigns in Kansas, along with so many other conservative causes that their political activities have their own Wikipedia page). The real threat is Obamacare. Under Obamacare, going to the gynecologist will be just like being sexually assaulted by a stranger in a creepy mask (And make no mistake: what happens in these ads is absolutely assault). Because… it’s the government! Despite OptOut’s internal and incomprehensible logic, the subversion of their opponent’s slogans around bodily autonomy is a clever tactical move to appeal to today’s youth.

What other partisan rallying cries could be re-purposed this election season?

“Keep your hands off my guns! Because I am a gun shop owner, and I’ll need you to pass a rigorous background check before I can sell you any of these!”

“We are the 99%! Of women who have used contraceptives! So let’s keep them freely available!”

“My body, my choice! My party controls your state’s legislative body, so I get to choose whether you get abortion access!”

“You’ll take my guns from my cold dead hands! Because most gun deaths in America are suicides, and we need to talk about mental health care in this country!”

“‘Don’t tread on me,’ says the Earth! We should treat her with more respect! Stop pollution!”

The OptOut.org website provides more information on why Obamacare is bad for young adults, in their opinion, and they make a few solid points (rising rates and so on) — the same ones we’ve heard since the beginning of this whole debate. But none of those points include the part of your yearly physical where a scary government agent comes in with a speculum and cackles wildly. In fact, I’m beginning to think they made that part up.

The really scary thing is that OptOut.org can disseminate this misinformation — and get away with it. People still don’t really understand the Affordable Care Act. And as long as we’re uninformed, we’re vulnerable to these kinds of insane attacks. So go read up on the ACA! Read the White House’s new shiny informational website! I promise, it doesn’t involve Uncle Sam getting anywhere near your vagina.